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Rules for My Unborn Son | MetaFilter
Sep 22, · “The one with the gold makes the rules.” So says the first-ever quote on Walker Lamond’s blog, ‘ Rules for my Unborn Son’. This website is dedicated to accumulated pieces of wisdom or know-how in your day-to-day life/5(51). My gardening skills never progressed beyond a patio tomato plant on a New York rooftop. But I think famers are swell, and no food taste quite as good as food you grow yourself. Does anyone have any good rules, tips, or advice about farming, gardening, or growing food? Send them my way, I’d love to share. We could all use a green thumb. May 21, · With regard to this website: Rules for My Unborn Son reminds me a lot of Life's Little Instruction Book-- a book surprisingly diminutive in size given its bloated payload of pablum, banality, and commandment.
1001 rules for my unborn son pdf download
Sadly, some things we love will never come back. The fedora is one of them. It's like the site was made to be MeFi-bait. I'm still looking to see if it has anything about pinstripes and whether or not they ought to be sported.
I don't think I'll be buying the book. Besides, I have daughter and the most important rule for her is: "Stay pretty and you'll only have to work half as hard. If you have an idea for a book but can't find a publisher, just get a blog first. Yeah, that one is certain to light up the languagehat beacon.
Jesus, you're really reading all these aren't you? 1001 rules for my unborn son pdf download, it must be so awesome to be a guy and get rewarded for following the rules of the kyriarchy. We women are sick of getting punished regardless of our actions! Trying to impart all of your thoughts to your kids like this will only make them see you as hypocritical and overweening. Just love them and give them the support to learn life's little ins and outs on their own.
Address anyone who carries a firearm professionally as Sir or Ma'am. This guy clearly should have had his kid some time around At least now the little one has an handy rebellion to-do list. These rules are not very helpful for unborn children. Here are some more on-point guidelines: 1. Don't poop yet. Stop kicking your mom in the kidneys. I'll make sure she owes you one later. Head first. Feet first, I kick your ass. Once your eyes start to work, check to see if you still have a tail.
It will blow your mind, if you have one yet. Eleventy-six: Just order the dang beans, already. Wait a minute. These aren't rules for an unborn son -- these are rules for a son who's already been born. They should have rules like: Work on growing your spine first.
There'll be plenty of time for you to work on your arms and fingers later. No amount of kicking or jumping is going to change anything. They may look cool now but trust me, they're not helping anyone. Hold 1001 rules for my unborn son pdf download, pull out chairs, easy on the swears. I'm getting really nauseated reading these.
I wonder what his wife thinks about 31 "No one likes a know-it-all", which is illustrated with a photo of Hillary Clinton. Don Draper would beat the shit out of this guy. Remember, the girl you're with is somebody's sister. And he's perfectly capable of kicking your ass. Doesn't even make sense. Is he implying that if the girl you're dating only has sisters, then you should feel free to rape 'er as much as you like?
That shit isnt by accident. Fucking Jew Alphabet bankers. But sadly, this blog functions as a contraceptive.
At the bottom of page 1, don't direct your reader to page 2 with the word "Previous". Oh please, please, please don't be a fag. So does this guy work for Esquire, or does he just with he did? Most MeFites suck the fun out of everything. Ignore them, do what you will and be proud of it.
I used to have the Lego fire truck associated with rule number 6. I've since lost the instructions. Never eat anything that is bigger than your head, 1001 rules for my unborn son pdf download. Damn, Dad, no pressure or anything. Don't underestimate your fertility. That's what I've been doing wrong! Damn, muddgirl, you're really reaching for that indignation angle. Follow instructions. Rule Number 6: There is NO, 1001 rules for my unborn son pdf download.
Rule Number 6. Rule Number 7: No pooftahs! Drink rail liquor. A good drink never needs more than one ingredient. Usually ice. This is so wrong I don't even know where to start. Perhaps by noting that if there's only one ingredient, and that ingredient is ice, where does the 1001 rules for my unborn son pdf download liquor come in? Also, can anyone seriously advocate the drinking of straight, warm Old Crow?
Beat 1001 rules for my unborn son pdf download head and the body will die. I hope his unborn son's mother makes the "wanky-wanky" hand gesture whenever she sees this stroker sitting at the laptop cranking these out. I wouldn't describe what I'm doing as "reaching". I am reading the "rules" he has presented for his son and judging them as most people in this thread have, 1001 rules for my unborn son pdf download.
Make sure your father does his obsessive listmaking before you're born, because in a few short months he's going to be so sleep-deprived he can barely remember his own name, he's gonna be a lot less sure about everything, and he's not gonna have time to fuck around on the computer. Just don't hurt nobody. Unless of course they ask you.
I named you Skippy for a reason. Live down to it. Don't use a chisel for anything other than its intended purpose. Dude, you're at and you're already throwing up pointless, insipid rules like that? I think you might want to reconsider this blog of yours. Your favorite band will suck. Men with facial hair have something to hide. Yeah, our contempt for douchebags with hangups about facial hair. That was one of the small handful of rules I agreed with. A chisel is only useful if it's very, very sharp, and using one as a pry bar pretty much kills it.
I know the context of the "Brando" photo, but the joke is dumb. If he's doing one a day, that kid's gonna be born WAY before he's finished. There are people in this world who will exploit and take advantage of anything and everyone, 1001 rules for my unborn son pdf download. No event, no matter how sacred, no person, no matter how defenseless, will be seen as anything other than a chance to gain some advantage or make a quick buck.
Teach by example. For my heartaches. For my headaches. Rules for my Unconceived Son: 1 Try really hard not to get implanted. I've heard variations on the "the girl is someone's sister" rule, and the implications always bothered me - mostly for the assumptions it makes on men's morality.
Either way, I always gag a bit when I hear this, and I wonder where the frack the speaker is coming from. Just kind of making conversation with my unborn son.
I think. I am not totally sure how all of that works. I've heard variations on the "the girl is someone's sister" rule I have too.
The other thing it implies is that if you get out of hand, the woman isn't going to be able to resist. As if she needs her brother's protection to survive your stupid roughneck self. I did your mom.
Lil Ro - Letter to My Unborn Child ft. PQ
, time: 4:271001 rules for my unborn son pdf download
My gardening skills never progressed beyond a patio tomato plant on a New York rooftop. But I think famers are swell, and no food taste quite as good as food you grow yourself. Does anyone have any good rules, tips, or advice about farming, gardening, or growing food? Send them my way, I’d love to share. We could all use a green thumb. I was browsing around, searching for different sites, new blogs, new ideas for articles and I found this great site called 'rules for my unborn son'. It's a set of rules that this guy, Walker Lamond, puts down for his future son. You can even add your own on the blog - which I suggest you check out. I love this kind of stuff. I've learned so many important lessons from my Dad and my Mom that I. May 21, · With regard to this website: Rules for My Unborn Son reminds me a lot of Life's Little Instruction Book-- a book surprisingly diminutive in size given its bloated payload of pablum, banality, and commandment.
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